


Is love even a real thing?

by DeoIsReckless



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Blow Jobs, Drunk Sex, F/M, First Time, Fluff, Hand Jobs, M/M, Protective Zayn, Rating: M, Sad Niall, Sassy Louis, Shame, Shy Liam, Smut, Teasing, and more - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-27
Updated: 2014-05-07
Packaged: 2018-01-20 20:52:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1525235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeoIsReckless/pseuds/DeoIsReckless
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry is in love with Louis, his all-time best friend, and Zayn knows this and will do anything that is on his reach to get them together. Zayn also falls for the nerdy, invisible guy who you would hardly even remember. Louis begins to discover feelings he didn't saw before and tells everything to Niall, and also, the blonde cutie falls for a girl that is "totally" out of his reach.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You can't call it love

****

It was late on the evening; the curly boy had just finished having dinner and he told both of his parents he would be upstairs, probably listening to some music or trying to sleep a little bit. He quickly made his way to his room and began to undress himself from that horrible school uniform he had always hated. Once he had nothing but boxers on, he let himself fall into his bed and took his phone from the corner table, picking out “ _Somebody to love_ ” from Queen, one of his all-time favourite bands. As the music started, he left himself fall into that deep zone where his feelings crashed with the lyrics of the song, turning those two into powerful reasons to start crying. It had really been a long day, after all. The longest and saddest of them all.

 

That day, the boy he loved the most, had been talking with an unbelievable and, kind of, adorable cheeky smile (with those crinkles popping up at his eyes), about his new girlfriend. He even admitted he thought he was in love. And, well, what can a, supposedly straight guy, tell to his best friend about his relationship? No, he can’t tell him his feelings. In fact, he has to continue with hiding them. Exactly what he has been doing for the past couple of years; Harry has been secretly in love with his best friend, with this guy who loved to play football and was a God of mischief and a natural comedian, with that ball of sass; he was deeply in love with Louis Tomlinson.

 

“I think that she’s the right one” he said, looking to the sky like a fool would do “I mean; we get on really well, I like her a lot…well, I actually sort of feel something different from before”

“Different?” he asked, trying not to sound so obvious.

“Yes” he chuckled in mid-sentence “I mean, every time I look at her, it’s like, I don’t know” he shook his head, like trying to get a thought out of it “I think I’m in love”

 

“I think I’m in love” he kept repeating to himself, like if he wanted to get it written on his mind, hoping that in that way, it would hurt a lot less more.

 

“But” he cleared his throat “I mean, is love even a _real thing_?”

“I don’t know” he looked at him “I just, like, I think it’s love”

“Oh” he looked away “you _think_ it is love”

“Harry, mate” he seated, leaving his pose of lying on the grass “you’re acting weird”

“Fine, I’m just trying to help” he seated, too.

“How? Trying to make me doubt about my own feelings?” he said, jokingly.

“Can’t I be interested in the relationship of my best friend?” he looked away; he was blushing because he was getting kind of upset “I just don’t want you to get hurt” he mumbled.

“Oh, Harry” he hugged him tightly, grabbing his waist firmly with his hand “I’m going to be fine, I’m pretty sure she’s the right one”

“I don’t think so; she seems kind of the wrong one to me”

 

Oh, poor boy; wasn’t his love too obvious?

 

“You just haven’t got to know her yet” he breathed deeply, making Harry even more upset because he knew he did it because of her “She is really, really sweet and has got those beautiful eyes that drive me crazy, and that beautiful way of speaking that makes me feel like a fool and the terrible shakes I get whenever I see her”

“Is that what you call love?” he looked repulsed at him “that sounds terrible. That is not love”

“Harry, stop it” he said in a serious tone, getting away from the hug “I know that this I’m feeling it’s love, okay?”

“I’m just giving my opinion to you; I don’t think that that is love” he crossed his arms.

“Then how the hell would you describe love? You haven’t even had a girlfriend since you dated that girl, Amanda, in middle school!” he ripped grass from the ground “You don’t know what love is”

“Love is fulfilling yourself just by knowing that your other one is happy” he looked him, straight to the eyes “love is sharing, caring; love is something just so perfect, it makes you believe you can be anything in this world; love is beautiful, is loving the other without even caring about his preferences, choices or aspect, but love is a dangerous thing, too. Oh, so dangerous” he looked away, trying to hide back his watery eyes “love will bring you to your destruction if only one is giving it, and love,” he struggled “love is letting go”

 

They both remained in silence by a few seconds; Louis watching Harry with his mouth opened, amazed by what his friend had just said.

 

“That was” he gulped “really amazing and commoving, Harry”

 

He rolled on his back, trying to escape from the memories. Why couldn’t he love him back? Was it because he was a boy and not a girl? If that was the case, it wasn’t Harry’s fault; he didn’t choose what gender he was born with.

 

“Why can’t you love me like you love her, Lou?” he seated in front of his mirror “I have tried everything to catch your eye, but you don’t seem to even notice” he sniffled “I know I can make you happy” he cried out and whimpered “I would give anything for you to give me a chance”


	2. Just stop it, dude.

“Ugh, I hate Mondays so much” the black haired barked, grabbing an apple from the cafeteria table “they’re just, like, the worst day EVER”

“They’re just that, Zayn. A day”

“Oh, c’mon, Harold!” he rolled his eyes “you can’t deny that you hate Mondays as much as I do”

“Well, I do hate Mondays” he took a bowl of spaghetti “but I know that you are the winner when it comes to who hates Mondays the most”

“It’s called bitching, mate” he laughed lightly.

 

They had a class together before lunch time, Drama class, so they always walked to the cafeteria together and then met with the other guys at the table; they always picked the same to eat: Harry had this mania for spaghetti and orange juice since the year started, and when Zayn didn’t bring his usual turkey sandwich, he had an apple and a bottle of water. He was actually really healthy when it came to his nutrition. They made their way to the table, where Niall and Louis were already waiting for them.

 

“No, but, like, what if men could get pregnant?” said the blonde as he took a sip from his soda can “That would be totally off the hook, mate!”

“What you guys talking about?” asked Harry, taking his usual spot beside Louis.

“You know, Niall is just being a genius again” he said with that comic sound of sarcasm on his voice.

“Like that time he thought he could talk with the fish at the aquarium?” Zayn smirked.

“I swear that fella talked to me!” he almost yelled, with an ingenious look on his face.

“Oh God, he still calls him fella” hazelnut eyes laughed.

“He could talk with fish, I guess he likes the smell” he and Zayn chuckled. Obviously, this was some sort of reference to, well, you know what.

“Guys, stop it” Harry said “he was kind of out of his own that day; he went to the dentist, remember?”

“Oh, Harry, that’s why you can’t get laid” Zayn said, picking at his cuticles “you are always the one who takes the fun away”

“Shut up!” he blushed “I’m a virgin by choice; I’m waiting for the right person”

“Well, not your choice, obviously” he smirked.

“Oh, Zaynie” Louis patted his cheek “not because you have fucked almost every girl in this school means that Harry needs to do, too. He’s not as screwed as you are”

He sighed “whatever”

“Thanks” the curly said, smiling.

“Are we going to keep talking about Zayn’s laid nights? I don’t want to think about that while I eat my lunch” the Irish boy said, grabbing his hot-dog.

“What?” Zayn got closer to him “scared you might think that that sausage you’re eating is other thing, blondie?”

“Dude, shut up!” he left it fall on the table “gross” he mumbled, as Zayn let out a big laugh.

“Let’s stop talking about Zayn’s wiener, shall we?” Louis chuckled “I actually want to have a serious talk with you, boys”

“Yet another prank the mischief boy wants to pull to us” Zayn bit his apple.

“It’s not that, Malik” he looked at him “this is really serious”

“Well, we are already listening” Niall said, all excited by the announcement.

“Okay, here it goes” he took a deep breath, smiled and continued “me and Melissa are moving in together”

“What?” Harry almost choked on his food.

“Not like, this week, actually we are planning to do it when we both go to college” he looked all happy and eager.

“But we were going to be roommates!” he nearly yelled out of anger “we fucking planned it since we were in middle school, Louis!”

“Whoa, calm down, Harry” he tried to stroke his shoulder but he got away.

“I mean, that was our dream! We even started to save the money!”

“I think someone’s jelly…” Zayn mumbled.

“Shut your bloody mouth, Zayn!”

“Harry, Harry” Louis took both of his shoulders “it’s okay, Harry, we’re still going to be in the same university, okay?”

“It’s not okay” he stood up, taking his books with him “nothing is okay when it comes to you” he started to walk to the exit doors.

“Come back, Harry” Louis rolled his eyes.

 

The curly didn’t even glance at his direction; he just kept walking with fury and irritation.

 

“What is up with him lately?” Niall snorted.

“I don’t know; he’s been acting really weird the past few weeks. And even more when it comes to talking about Melissa”

“Maybe he is in fact jealous, like Zayn said” he pointed out.

“No” he thought it a little bit more “I-I don’t think so. Why would he be jealous, anyways?”

“Well” the black haired continued to bite his apple “he spent a lot of time with you before she appeared; maybe he feels like, being replaced or something”

“You need to talk with him and clear things up. I don’t think a girl who has just arrived to your life means more to you than your best friend since elementary, ya’ know”

“No one will ever have his place” he sighed “he’s like, my soul mate, and yes, I will talk with him as soon as possible to clear all this situation up”

 

+++

 

“Fucking Louis and his fucking girlfriend” he threw his books into the locker “Oh, look at me, I’m Melissa, the captain of the cheerleaders and, obviously, the captain of the football team is my boyfriend” he slammed the metallic door “we’re moving in together and breaking poor Harry’s feelings!” he groaned “fucking bullshit!”

 

He just couldn’t keep it in anymore. At first, he thought that Louis just had a crush on her, like if it would pass whenever he got bored. But they had been dating for months now, almost a year; he hated it. Louis had admitted that he thought he loved her, and that pretty much broke all Harry’s hopes and illusions; he had always knew Louis wanted a family, a beautiful wife and kids to rise. And if he was with Harry, he wouldn’t have the last two. Well, maybe the kids, but not biologically.

 

“I wish I had a vagina” he started to walk to his next class.

“Well, that’s what surgery is for” a voice behind him made a great surprise look on his face.

“I-I didn’t really meant it” he blushed, looking at the boy behind him.

“Why would you want one, anyways?”

“You know” he thought of something, really quick “they just get a lot more of consideration”

“What’s going on, Harry?” he brought himself closer.

“Oh, nothing” he scratched his neck “I was just going to my literature class and—“

“No” he interrupted the curly boy “you know what I mean. What was that, when we were having lunch?”

“I don’t really want to talk about your relationship again, Louis”

“It’s not my relationship; it’s your attitude, Harry” he sighed and continued “you’ve been really weird these last months, everything I say or make gets you angry”

“What? That’s not true!”

“You can’t refuse to accept it” he shook his head “the boys…they think you’re jealous”

 

Harry just stared at Louis with this angry face he made whenever he got irritated and tried to contain himself, as he did before. Could it be? Had Louis discovered Harry's true feelings about him? Maybe he even felt the same way as the curly did, and that way all the problems would vanish as dust into the air.

 

"Mate, listen to me. Melissa is the first girl that I actually kind of love" he gulped "but, Harry, if you feel something for her you should tell me right away"

 

No. Louis was, once again, wrong.

 

"What?" He almost choked.

"I'm not saying that—"

"How could you even think about that!?" He rolled his eyes "God, Louis, are you really that stupid?"

 

The blue-eyed just stared quietly at him.

 

"You know what?" He smiled angrily "Yes, that's why I've been acting like this these past months" he laughed "Yes, I like Melissa, got a problem with that?"

"She's my girlfriend"

"Well, I don't care" he spitted the words into his face "She's hot as hell, man" he said, sarcastically.

"I'm just trying to fix things up, Harry!"

"There's nothing to fix! Everything's alright, as always!" He screamed with hidden pain and hurt.

"Stop it, dude!" He said, and Harry's expression changed "stop pretending you are okay" he looked at him straight in the eyes "because I know you aren't"

 

And that was it. Harry fought he could take it anymore; he wanted aloud to know how much he loved him, how every night he couldn't sleep without thinking about those beautiful ocean-like eyes the gods gifted to him, those adorable crinkles on his eyes whenever he smiled and that raspy yet sexiest voice that drove him crazy as fuck whenever he heard it.

 

"No, I'm not okay"

 

They both stared at each other for a couple of seconds; Harry needed to get the guts to tell him.

 

"You got it right, Louis; I'm not okay" he sighed.

"You're the best friend I've ever had" he smiled lightly, taking Harry’s hands between his "Just tell me what's wrong, Harry. Please"

"Again" he mumbled "you were right. I am jealous. I’m jealous of your girlfriend”

 

He suddenly felt how his cheeks got hotter and hotter as the seconds got away, he couldn’t even bear to look into Louis’ eyes and his hands were shaking so much, he even thought that an earthquake was taking place at the moment. He got himself ready for Louis to tell him that they couldn’t be friends anymore, or that he was in fact disgusted with him, but he couldn’t care less. He just needed to get all that inspiring and fulfilling love that always appeared whenever Louis did.

 

He felt Louis’ hand gripping tighter around his, before slipping away into his face. He lifted is sight, and saw those beautiful cobalt round pieces matching the olive of his, melting his entire inside. Louis stroked his cheek gently, and Harry grabbed his hand.

 

“You should have said that before, Harold” he muttered.

“I just” he bit his lip “I was scared of what you would think”

“Don’t be silly” he laughed, hitting his nose with his finger “you know you can’t be replaced by anyone, like, never”

“Wait” he looked confused at him “what?”

“Yes” he smiled “You will always be my best friend, Harry, and not even a girl can take you away from me”

 

No way. Louis didn’t understand what he meant; he obviously didn’t even got a clue about the love his mate had for him.

 

“Wasn’t that what you meant?” he asked, and Harry just stared out of words at him “Harry?”

 

Harry had to think all again. He thought that Louis had finally accepted his love, that they could be something more than just friends and that he could free himself from the weight of having to lift that kind of secret with him; but once again, he was wrong. Louis had made up something really different from what Harry meant, and when the blue-eyed said that unlimited speech he always says about their friendship, he had to remember to stay silent and never tell anyone about it.

 

“Yes” he smiled “that’s—that’s definitely what I meant”

“I’m glad you could tell me how you really feel”

“I’m glad, too”

“But don’t be such a tease! Come here and hug me, boy!” he quickly got a tight grip around his waist and hugged him as tight as he could, making Harry to want Louis to fuck him.

“Lou! You’re crushing my lumps!”

“You aren’t still mad, right?”

“I’m still a little bit mad with you, mister” he looked at him “You know, we were going to be roommates and all…”

“Oh, so you’re still mad?” he smirked “that’s nothing a session of tickles by the ribs can’t change!”

 

He started to tickly under Harry’s jumper, making him laugh and get all excited, everyone looking at both of them. Harry left his books fall into the floor, as Louis was about to give him some sort of front-piggy-ride.

 

“Stop! Louis, there’s people!” he said, still laughing.

“Are you still mad?”

“No, I’m alright” he laughed “I’m alright, Lou”

 

He got his hand out and reached for Harry’s books, taking them into his arms and smiling from ear to ear.

 

“But you have to promise something to me” he said and Louis quit his happy face to one that looked as puzzled.

“What is it?”

“You have to promise me that you’ll think again about moving with Melissa”

“Okay” he started to walk and Harry did, too.

“No, Louis, I’m being serious!”

“Okay” he let out a soft chuckle “I’m being serious too”

“No, I mean like, serious _serious_ ”

“Yes, Harry” he gave him his books “I’ll think it a thousand times again, but only if you ask for it”

 

+++

 

“So, he already talked with you?”

“Yes” he seated on the passenger’s seat “I think we cleared it all up”

“Why have you been acting like that, anyways?” he started the car.

“I don’t really want to tell you, or you will make fun of me”

 

Zayn made a face as in disbelief, opening his mouth and blinking his eyes.

 

“I would NEVER do that to you, Harry”

“Yeah, sure”

“Well, if you don’t want to tell me, I don’t want to take you home today” he unlocked the doors “you can get out”

“Wow, that’s so mature of you” he rolled his eyes.

“I’m being serious”

“Just lock the doors again, I’ll tell you other day. I’m way too exhausted to talk about it”

“Gossip or GTFO” he said, jokingly.

“C’mon Zaynie. Just take me home, it was a hard day for me”

“Had way too many erections or what?” he chuckled.

“Just remember me—why are we even friends?”

“It’s because you’re secretly dying for getting banged from me” he winked.

“Shut up! Why are you so obsessed with your cock? Haven’t you got too many chicks talking of how huge is it already?”

“Do they really say it is huge?” he laughed.

“I—I don’t know. I just figured that out…” he tried to keep himself from looking at Zayn’s crotch, but it was something that he needed to do after having this conversation. As he took a glimpse of it, Zayn caught him and laughed.

“Want to see it?” he said teasingly, moving his eyebrows up and down.

“N—no!” he looked away into the window, crossing his arms and trying to make the cerise colour fade away from his whole face “you’re a jerk”

“So are you going to tell me or not?”

“Yes—just, just drive, okay?”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys like it! xx


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